Wax On, Wax Off

Daniel: Hey, what kind of belt do you have?
Miyagi: Canvas. JC Penney, $3.98; You like?
Daniel: [laughs] No, I meant...
Miyagi: In Okinawa, belt mean no need rope to hold up pants.
Miyagi: [laughs; then, seriously] Daniel-san,
Miyagi: [he taps his head] Karate here.
Miyagi: [he taps his heart] Karate here.
Miyagi: [points to his belt] Karate never here. Understand?

"Wax on....Wax off."
- Sean Reeder

My usual lesson with Coach Kevin was a "dry land" lesson. He gave me a long, red piece of surgical tubing, we went to the swim club's weight room, and did shoulder stabilization and abdominal exercises for about 30 minutes. After explaining all the excercises and watching me monkey around with the surgical tubing, Kevin said, "We've spent the past several months working on swimming from the core. Now we need to strengthen it." The Master had spoken, and I was listening. I spent an hour or so doing shoulder and abominal exercises last night, and the sweet pain is coursing through my body.

I've been truly fortunate to work with Mr. Miyagi like figures throughout my life. Kevin is one of them(http://www.brophysportscampus.org/coaches.html.) When we first started working together, we just did drills focusing on incorporating the core of the body into swimming. We didn't actually start taking strokes in the water until my third lesson. Now as we approach a new phase of training, we are going back to basics once again. I'm not quite where I want to be as a swimmer--I probably never will be--but there is a path laid out to get where I want to go.

When I first started working with my former boss, Sean Reeder, it was a similar process. Sean had me constantly focusing on the fundamentals. Each time he would give me such a task he would say, "Wax on. Wax off," then walk away and head to his office. Sean's work was always seamless as he was so focused on the fundamentals.

In my own life, I usually want to start running before I learn to walk. Often times I get ahead of myself and don't focus on the fundamentals of what I am doing. Usually things go pretty well when you nail the basics. I was thinking about fundamentals and focusing on the key components today. I went into the office to for about four hours. I got some momentum going and plan on carrying that into the work week on Monday.

After my time in the office today, I spent a good hour shining my shoes. When I was 17 my cousin John--who was attending West Point Military Academy and has since graduated--showed me how to shine shoes. The military technique involves lighting the polish on fire, dipping a shine cloth in water, then using the slightly damp cloth to shine the shoes. It's a relatively involved process, but you end up with really sharp looking shoes if you work with care.

The first time John showed me how to shine shoes like this, I thought it was sort of stupid. Now, when I need to blow off some steam, I usually take a good 45 minutes and shine my shoes. For some reason it just seems to clear my head. I don't think that this really has much to do with the actual act of shining my shoes, but more with the idea that I am forced to slow down. As much as I enjoy what I do professionally, accounting is full of deadlines. There is no deadline for shining shoes, or sipping Scotch whiskey. They are done when they are done, not any sooner or later.

It's interesting how this idea of working with a focus and taking your time comes down to one of my favorite and most perplexing practices: balance. Sean knew how to work slow. It's a fine balance, and counter intuitive.

Namaste

Another Rainy Day in Phoenix

"We are what we think.
All that we are arises with our thoughts.
With our thoughts we make the world.
Speak or act with an impure mind
And trouble will follow you
As the wheel follows the ox that draws the cart.

We are what we think.
All that we are arises with our thoughts.
With our thoughts we make the world.
Speak or act with a pure mind
And happiness will follow you
As your shadow, unshakable."
- Ascribed to The Buddha from the Dhammapada

Most of the time, I get up earlier on Saturday mornings than I do during the work week. Usually, the alarm goes off at 5:30 AM, I jump out of bed, put on the running gear, make myself an English muffin with peanut butter and honey, and get coffee at Starbucks. By the time all these things are done, I am at the run site by 6:50 AM, with the running starting at 7 AM. It's a lot of hoops to jump through. At the same time, the people I run with are fantastic and we usually get breakfast after the run. Today was not most Saturdays though.

Instead of doing the group run today, I slept. I've weathered the first storm of our busy season at work, and the fatigue has set in. Last weekend was a wonderful break from the normal world I live in, which lasted just long enough to let all the stress and fatigue rise to the surface. It's not gone though. So, I took in an extra three hours of sleep, stumbled out of the house, and read the latest issue of Esquire this morning. Yeah, I'll say it, life doesn't get much better than that.

To top things off, I took my new pants in for alterations on Monday, got them back on Wednesday, and they have been incorporated into the "rotation." Last night I headed off to the barbershop, and got a hair cut. Jerome had a string of clients waiting, so I went to a new barber--a young Russian guy by the name of Immanuel--who cleaned up my hair nicely. He doesn't have Jerome's semi-pornographic stories, or Jay's guiding presence, but he gave me a fantastic neck shave. We all have our strengths; his is the straight edge razor.

Over the past few years I have spent a lot of time putting together plans and strategies that we focused solely on professional developement, or athletic achievement. Those are still my passions and I'll probably obsess over these two things for the rest of my life. What's interesting to me at this moment is that I am actually beginning to give myself breaks and rest as I go about these things. They say that true wisdom is the practice. Maybe I actually am learning.

Had two lessons with Coach Kevin this week, working on the same thing: the recovery of my left arm. Instead of recovering with a high elbow, I am recovering with a straight arm. This in turn is affecting my catch and overall balance and body position in the water. He gave me the adjustments to make, and I thought I was making them as I swam. When I touched the wall, he asked me what I thought, and I said, "Wow, that was totally differnt." He smiled and said, "Your stroke hasn't changed."

He brought out the video camera, and sure enough, the high elbow recovery was not in place. Homeostasis was getting in the way of getting the right feedback. We broke the stroke down, did some drills, and at the end of the lesson agreed that this was the missing component my freestyle right now.

What is amazing to me is that I think a lot of people do exactly what I was doing in their lives. We decide we want to make a change, but end up going out there are just practicing the same mistakes all over again, thinking that we are making these changes in our lives. The only way that I can see to make such changes is to get real time, fact based feedback over a consistent period of time, and unrelentingly practice these new skills.

I've been thinking about this concept of "practicing our old mistakes" over the past few days. I don't think that one can really "think" there way through this process of change. You just have to plunge in, work with good people, put your energy towards making such changes, and dispassionately wait for things to evolve.

I'd like to believe that this blog has been a conduit for change. I don't think that I would actually take rest over a long run and breakfast, if MAD hadn't gotten on my case on several occassions and told me to rest. After him beating me over the head numerous times with this information, I'm starting to get to a point where I know when to back off. I don't think that I have this skill mastered yet--I probably never will--but I am starting to practice it.

The rest of my day is going to be mellow. I'm heading off to swim in the next few minutes, and take a long nap after. I may or may not purchase a bottle of Scotch whiskey. I just finished a bottle of Bruichladdich, and cannot decide whether or not I "need" another bottle. My inner Bohemian is fighting it out with my Accounting brain as to whether or not I can justify the purchase. We'll see how I feel after my nap. A field trip may be necessary if this rain keeps up, and I have a lot of time on my hands for self reflection.

Namaste

Moments of Solace

"Love doesn't make the world go 'round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile."
- Franklin P. Adams

I'm writing this from my adopted aunt's computer in Santa Monica, California. The weather here is beyond perfect. It's maybe 70 degrees--and this is the beginning of February--there is an ocean breeze blowing through my window right now, and everything is green and lush in there little pocket of California. Everything is perfect right now. I want nothing to change. According to Asaf Shafir, "Love is a place where you want absolutely nothing to change." So, I am following the Gospel according to Asaf and "feeling the love."

The past month of work has been a wild ride. My former manager at work received a promotion at year end, so I have a new manager that I report to directly. From where I sit, things are going really well with him--I'll refer to this person as Armando. We've been slammed with work, but each time a potential issue or problem comes up, we have been able to recover with grace. It's been a lot fun, and challenging at the same time--that rare mix that comes together in professional environment where you really trust the people right beside you in the trenches. Regardless, the past month has been exhausting. So, I hopped in the car at 4 AM in the morning on Saturday and drove to Santa Monica--thanks for encouraging me to take a break MAD.

Twice a year Barney's rents out an airplane in Santa Monica and has a huge end of season sale. I went last year with my cousin Maria and her husband, Matt. Matt bought a beautiful cashmere overcoat that was originally priced at $1,800 for $799. I've been waiting for this sale for over a year and found out that it was starting on Friday, February 8th. It seemed that the stars had aligned for me. A break was needed, and deeply discounted suits were to be had. Two word were dancing in my mind: road trip!

Most of the drive to Los Angeles was done in the dark. I got a big cup of coffee the night before I left, heated it up that morning, and put away the miles as I blasted a road trip compilation cd that I had made earlier this week. I wouldn't say that this cd was my finest compilation to date, but there were a few gems on the album. The front half was full of country music, mostly Jerry Jeff Walker, some Boz Scaggs, and a cut from Jerry Jeff's kid, Django, that I really dig. The back half was predominantly made up of songs from my favorite Irish singer/songwriter, Van Morrison--AKA "The Belfast Cowboy."

Earlier this year, I downloaded the song "Irish Heartbeat." About 100 miles into the trip, I became fixated with it; I must have listened to this song 20 times in a row that morning. Probably about the tenth consecutive time I played it, I started to cry like a little girl. The lyrics reminded me of this past Christmas with Aunt Shelly, and the rest of the Irish contingent, and the wonderful time we spent together over that week. Not sure exactly what it was, but I was balling. I'm guessing that I had some accumulated stress or fatigue that hadn't been processed and that song triggered it. It all came out on that empty interestate, and by the time I hit Indio I felt emotionally cleaned out.

One of the things I have learned about buying suits is that you never go alone. What looks great at the store, will sometimes look like shit when you get home, and some times you pass up a truly beautiful item because it's not exactly what you are looking for. My companion at this sale was my aforementioned adopted aunt--Marilee Frasier-Koch. Marilee is the queen of the Zen shopping experience. We met at her home in Santa Monica, had breakfast, where she gently deprogrammed me and told me to be open to what the Gods of Retail provide, and to approach the sale with an open mind.

Within five minutes of being at the sale, Marilee and I had identified the two suits I would end up purchasing. We held on to about five other potential purchases, tried all of them on, but eventually settled on those first few "gut reaction" items. I left the airplane hanger with a three-button navy pinstripe suit, and a two-button grey pinstripe suit. They are both of a slimmer cut, and fit beautifully in the shoulders. I was able to purchase two beautiful suits, which each retailed for $1,300 USD each, for slightly under $1,300 all together. It was definitely worth the money spent on gas.

After my retail adventure, and the consumption of an enormous chicken parmesan sandwich, I fell into a deep, dreamless sleep on the couch. Sometime around 6 PM, I woke up to the sound of Nate and Lauren--Marilee and my uncle Bobby's god-children--knocking on the door. I went upstairs to clean up, and they started to make dinner. They cooked scallops and shrimp, french beans, which were served with a green salad; they backed this up with chocolate and pistachio cannolis and herbal tea for desert. It was wonderful. Time seemed to move much slower than it usually does at that dinner table. We were all laughing and talking, reliving old memories that have somehow gotten sweeter, and more nuanced as our lives have moved forward. So I will say, once again as I said earlier in this piece, I wanted nothing to change in those moments. I won't say that they were perfect, but will say that they were full of love.

So, now I am back in Phoenix--I started writing earlier this morning, and am finishing this piece at my home computer. I drove back this morning around 9 AM. Nothing really eventful happened--no emotional breakdonwns, no great insights into life, no car problems. I made good time, have done my laundry, shined my shoes, and am winding down for the evening. Whereas most weekend feel like the days were 15 minutes long, I feel like I have gotten 4 days worth of rest and relaxation out of this one. My mind is clear and I am ready to get back at it and go kick some ass. I'm ready to re-enter my life again, and feel extremely grateful for the moment of solace that I was given.

Namaste

The Spiritual Teachings of Isaac Newton

"For every action there is an equal, and opposite reaction."
- Isaac Newton, the 3rd Law of Newtonian Physics

My original title for this piece was called "Karma Is a Bitch." I decided to take the high road and use the more appropriate, adult title. Anyway, over the weekend I intercepted a piece of intelligence that was extremely upsetting. Apparently, some of my co-workers have been making comments about me behind my back. Now I don't have written documentation of this, but just hearing this as a possibility was extremely upsetting.

As I was driving to work today, the anger of it all sort of built in my stomach. I felt a headache coming on, and then I had the most amazing, startling thought that sort of put everything into perspective: "I am guilty of the exact same thing." In my daily life, I've talked about people behind their back. I've made judgements about people that I didn't completely know, or understand. I'm guilty of it as much as anyone else. It's something that I am not proud of, but I have done this.

So, as I was hitting the back half of the drive, it occurred to me that this is the Universe coming back and kicking me in the ass. It's not pretty, but this was undoubted proof that what you do put out there will come back and get you. What applies the natural world also applies to the world of human dynamics. It's a painful awakening, but it seems like the only way that most people grow is through pain.